Confessions of a Young Christian Wife Part I*

What Should Be the Wife's 'Role' in Marriage? Biblical Wife Good Wife Bible on Marriage and Wifehood Women hood submission how to be a good wife what the bible says about being a wife

I had an interesting thought today, there is no venture in my life that I have stepped into without researching first except that of being a good wife. I am the researcher it's just my thing literally. I know all there is to know about wedding planning, shopping on a budget, and human resources theories and application. But I don’t have a clue about how to be a good wife. It wasn't until today that the thought crossed my mind, how can I give my marriage all it deserves if we don't have a solid foundation.

Usually, I would turn to Google, books, or a blog post but this time I felt it important to base my understanding on my faith. After all faith is what brought us together and God's hands is what will keep us together. So I'm starting this journey to better understand my role as a young Christian wife and to learn more about the word. 

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 Are your fulfilled in your role as his wife?

Early on I thought being a wife would be easy, like most young women think. Honestly I thought things would stay the same, because we already lived together and were partners. Now 6 months in I realized marriage takes work and its a 2 way street. 

  • Are you struggling to balance marriage, life, and work?
  • Are you fighting with your husband more than you would like?
  • Are you wondering if you made the right choice?
  • Are you feeling like the burning flame (you and your husband once shared) has dimmed? 

Why its all important?

Marriage is not inherit to anyone, it takes a concentrated effort. You've probably heard that a thousand times right. I have too and let me tell you I never believed it until right now.  Our nature is to fix our issues by voicing our opinions, after all we want to be heard especially in our marriage. Well I don't know the answer to how to fix it, but I do believe the foundation for marriage has already been provided to us in the Bible. 

MARRIAGE IS FOR A LIFETIME. WE WANT TO SPEND THAT LIFETIME HAPPY AND FULFILLED.
— ChellBee
What Should Be the Wife's 'Role' in Marriage? Biblical Wife Good Wife Bible on Marriage and Wifehood Women hood submission how to be a good wife what the bible says about being a wife

Ephesians 5:22-23

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.
— Bible ESV

I'm starting with a rather controversial verses about how to be a good Christian wife. I think this is a popular and likely misunderstood verse. I'm not an expert or minister. But I do understand human nature and psychology. With that being said our personal experiences shapes how we interpret the information with consume. So how I interpret this verse is completely different than how you may, but none the less these were my takeaways.  I know that some of you absolutely are not willing to submit but hopefully this will be some food for thought for you.

 

allowing your man to be the man

Submission in marriage is so important to a healthy marriage. Remember submission is not about being childlike or docile. But it's about allowing him to lead you and your household. This makes perfect sense when you think about it right. We are all lead by someone and your husband should be that someone you want to follow. He should set an example of the type of person you strive to be and enable your betterment as a person.

 

needs of men versus women

This passage really sets into place the difference between the sexes. I don’t think it's speaking on gender roles or traditional/biblical roles as much as it speaks to the needs of women and men. Although we all thrive on both. When you really think about it our essences at the core craves one over the other. At the core,

  • Men need respect.
  • Women need love.

 

lean on your husband and leverage his strengths

This passage really put things in perspective for me. As wives it’s important to pull the best out of our husband to ensure our advancement as partners. Ultimately submission to me doesn't mean women must shrink themselves. As much as it is about allowing men to be men.

personal Note

I don’t believe allowing your husband to lead means silencing yourself. I believe the goal should be to be on the same page and to respect one another even when you disagree.

FAVORITE bible RESOURCES

  1. Bible, ESV Black Bible

  2. Journal, Pink All Things Are Possible Journal

  3. Study Bible, The ESV Study Bible

  4. Binder, 3 Ring Binder

  5. Colored Pens, Ballpoint Pens, Assorted Colors

  6. Highlighter, Sharpie Accent Colored Highlighters

  7. War Room Movie, War Room: Prayer Is a Powerful Weapon

  8. Daily Devotional, Wake Up to Hope: Devotional

  9. Bookmarks, Cupcake i-clips Magnetic Bookmarks

  10. Sticky Note, Post-it Page Markers, Assorted Colors

  11. Bible Journal Beginners Guide (blog post)

  12. Daughter of the King Devotional App

What to expect?

We’re going to explore marriage, being a wife, and Christian as seen in the bible throughout this series. Join me on this journey, let's read and discuss these passages together. I'm looking forward to comparing notes.

What are your thoughts on submission in marriage?