What Every Bride Needs to Know about Bridesmaids
There is so many reasons why choosing a good bridesmaid is important. We all have our fair share of friends. But it takes a particular caliber person to be a good bridesmaid. Believe it or not being a bridesmaid is not for everyone. Here are a few characteristics you should look for when deciding who will be a part of your dream wedding day.
5 Characteristics of a Good Bridesmaid
- Problem Solver There is nothing worse than someone coming to you with a problem and no possible solutions. Maybe it is just me but that truly works my nerves. I do not want to spend an hour talking about the problem. I want to know what the issue is and go straight to possible solutions. This is a must have the quality of good bridesmaids. Weddings are really fast pace so there is not a lot of time to cry over problems. Pictured Above is (my sisters) Tay, Keshia, and myself. Keshia is a true problem solver when ish hit the fan, she stepped up and saved the day no questions asked and no tears over spilled milk. She has flawlessly executed the planning of the bridal shower and bachelorette.
- Calm I am sure this one is pretty obvious but in the may lay having people around you that know how to stay calm despite a crisis, will only help you have a stress-free day.
- Honest We all need our friends, to be honest with us. But this one does come with a stipulation, bridesmaids need, to be honest. But that does not need they need to voice every opinion they have. Everyone has their own vision of their wedding day. They should be honest but also know when to shut up.
- Understanding A good bridesmaid understands no one is perfect and allows you to be yourself. We all have are panic attacks, bridezilla moments, and pure insanity moments. But a good bridesmaid helps you thru it and doesn’t hold it over your head.
- Reliable I know this seems like common sense. But the last thing you want to be worrying about on during your big day is whether or not your bridesmaids will be there. There are so many events that go on during and before your big day so make your bridesmaid will show up and show out for your big day.
Being a good bridesmaid is not rocket science. Being a bridesmaid is simple, be a friend and the type of bridesmaid you would want for your own day. Understand the bride's life is about to change forever. Be selfless and do not make this about you because it is not about you and will never be (that is just not the way marriage works sorry). Be patient because weddings and marriage is a process and every bride needs a strong support system. A good bridesmaid recognizes that the bride’s life is changing and they try to find a way to adapt to that change and be a part of her new life.
I know choosing your bridesmaid seems like a no brainer (Like most other brides I chose my friends and sisters). But think wisely because weddings (and funerals) bring out people's true colors. A wedding is a really quick way to see someone’s true color and often times it is can be the end to a friendship. So make sure that you ask people to be a part of your day that truly care about you and your partner having an amazing wedding day.
Make sure they believe in the love you share and how special your union is to your future together. Anything or anyone less than that will be a mistake, take it from me (I have had 2 arguments with bridesmaids and have one less best friend to show for it. Your wedding is not the place to relive the good old days.). Your wedding party should include people who are integral and support you and your future significant other future together as one.
Keeping your Bridesmaids in Check
Maybe it’s a women thing but wrangling in bridesmaids can be a full-time job and when you’re planning a wedding you really don’t have a lot of time to spend on it. So here are a few tips on how to keep your bridesmaid in check and save yourself a headache.
- Check in periodically Planning a wedding is a full-time job in itself. So obviously worrying about a bridal shower or bachelorette party is the furthest thing from your mind. But please do not forget to periodically check in with your bridesmaid, to see where they are in the process. I personally waiting until the last minute (maybe 45 days before the wedding) and found out we didn’t even have a bridal shower venue yet. No, you don’t have to micromanage the process but you do want to make sure things are getting done in a timely manner.
- Make sure your vision is known There is nothing worse than expecting others to deliver on your vision and being disappointed. So if you have a theme or idea in mind ensure that you share that with all your bridesmaids. Sharing your vision for the day ensures you will not be disappointed. The most effective way to do so is to share a few photos of what you have envisioned.
- Delegate roles to each bridesmaid So regardless of what the task everyone has a certain role they will play. Assigning roles on the front end will make for less friction among the bridesmaids. Assigning roles ensure consistency across your events. When assigning bridesmaid roles make sure you utilize your bridesmaid skills. For instance, if you have a social butterfly assign her to invites and hostess duties, this will ensure your guest and you have a great experience.
You are the bride and no one can take that from you. So be honest about your opinion and how you feel. This is your day and everyone’s job is to help you execute your vision. Take it from this bride of the past, these memories will last a lifetime. So make sure you enjoy every moment and when possible try not to take it personal when others get carried away. After all, everyone is just trying to help. Don’t be afraid to say no and ready to let go of anyone who doesn’t understand that this day is about you and your future partner.